I was raped by family friends

Linda Mafilika is a lively, confident twenty seven year old lady from De Aar.  However, happiness had evaded her for the most part of her life. This happened when she lost her virginity at the tender age of 9 years, when she didn’t even know what the meaning of sex was. “I was raised by my grandmother because my mother had relocated to Johannesburg to seek employment. 

 My grandmother was very protective of us. She would lock the gate saying it was for our own protection,” said Linda adding that her grandmother only allowed close male friends to visit the house.  One day, that male family friend asked Linda to join her in one of the old toilets.  She went in not knowing that would be the day she lost her pureness

“He told me to close the door behind me and keep quiet. And then he took off my clothes. I was shocked to see him take off his clothes especially because I had never seen a male adult’s private parts. My mind shut off as he forced himself on to me.  My body felt dead. I couldn’t even respond when he asked me questions thereafter.  He wanted to know if I had enjoyed myself. I just kept quiet. He gave me ten cents and made me promise not to tell anyone,” she explained.

 When Linda went back into the house she found her grandmother cleaning the kitchen floor. “It was hard for me to tell my grandmother what had happened because she admired the guy very much, so I kept quiet.  She would say; unesimilo ke lomfana uyabusisa.” 

 Four years later, Linda was raped by another family friend.  “I tried to deal with the pain by blocking my mind from it and how it happened.  What I remember is the frame of the bed and the bedding which was white and shinny. The rest is blurry. It’s as if I had a brain injury.  I blamed myself especially when I saw blood coming from my virgina. I thought it was my fault,” she said.   “I became depressed and isolated myself from people. My family would describe me as a quiet shy person while I was dying inside  “My perpetrators stole my childhood from me. I grew up feeling disgusted and dirty thinking people like me deserved nothing but hell. I cried every night in silence. And I would wake up early and change my pillow case because I didn’t want a pity party from my family.   I literally saw myself as an alien.  I lived my life through my baby sister.  She was brilliant. She rode a bike, danced and even played in the streets. I couldn’t because I died long time ago,” said Linda.